Sunday, February 20, 2005

Surprise!!

I FINALLY GOT A NEW CAR!!!!!

No pictures yet, I think I may do that tomorrow. I can't believe and for those of you who know my family, this is a huge deal. My other car is pretty much dead, but good ol' dad came through. It's not brand new, but it's new to me and it's wonderful. It's a 2001 Sabaru Forester. It's silver and fully-loaded. I mean fully-loaded. The biggest sunroof I've ever seen, EVER! That's my favorite part, by the way. It has a 6-CD changer in the front, heated seats, automatic everything, 4-wheel drive, cute little cubbies everywhere, it tells me what the temperature is outside. And finally, I have some pick-up. Praise the Lord! It's so cute!

So that has been the highlight of my weekend.

Church was absolutely amazing, really it was. Mike did a fabulous message about the mission for your life, but more so, the amazing and God-part of it was seeing him be vulnerable and share his heart openly with the congregation. Showing us the passion he has for the lost is awesome.

And more good news....I'm on the upswing and getting over the worst cold of the century.

Oh, I had a four-year old ask me this week if I was pregnant. Now that's not nice. I'm not fat or anything for her to think that, she's just being four. But me and my mom laughed so hard.

Monday, February 14, 2005

Share the well

Have you guys heard this new album by Caedmon's Call?
If not, you should, amazing!!!!! God-inspired.

It hit me hard and convicted me. If you don't know anything about it, it's about their travels to Brazil, Ecuador, and mainly India. What did they learn? To share the well, to put into life what Americans have forgotten: The Great Commission. If you have listened to this CD and have read the words to the song and have not felt ANYTHING something is wrong.

One song in particular touched me: Mother India

Father forgive me for I have not believed like Mother India
I've groaned and grieved
Father forgive me I forgot your grace
Your spirit falls on India
Capture me in your embrace

The chorus to the song. There are so many thoughts that are running through my brain right now and so many emotions going through my heart.

Listening to this song on the drive back from the Christian Bookstore I thought to myself, "There is something great happening!" Does anyone else see it? Something amazing and awesome and nothing this country has ever seen or experienced. Something unimaginable and holy. God is in that country and throughout it's people. People (I don't know what people) are saying now that India is the next China. In terms of Christianity. China has a huge underground Christian church and it's exploding and growing faster than we can imagine. And not only is it growing, but these people are strong believers that have risked everything. India is close behind. A country that many believe to be without hope and would never have thought Christianity would be present are mistaken. This country is seeing people come to know that Lord in unfathomable fashions. It's a God-thing. Do you see that something great is happening in this world? And where are we in this? If we are no where we are wrong. Even if we aren't "goers", we should be "senders". Do something, pray, come on!

There was a story in the CD coverbook about a woman in another song that when asked what she was thankful and grateful for she did not answer God's gifts or His mercies or blessings or things that He had done for her. She answered, "I am thankful I know Him." She is thankful she knows Christ and that is it! Where have we missed it? Why have others seen it and we have not?

There is so much more I want to say and just put my thoughts down. But now is not the time. Soon, but not now. I encourage everyone to look inside each of you and to ask God to reveal to you what it is your part can be in this great thing that God is doing on the other side of the world. Everyone has their place.

Back again

I went to Anderson this weekend. Jen was in Homecoming court and so I went to Homecoming. Sara went with me and we got a wonderful sticker that said we were alumni. That's about it. Nothing else for the alumni really, sad I know. Jen didn't win, some girl I've never seen did. But oh well. I had a wonderful time with Sara all afternoon and we had incredible conversation. She and I always seem to have our best talks in strange places. It's when I was dropping her off that we really started talking and then we just sat in the car and talked. We always make a point to have coffee or something and it's just not as good as sitting in the car or something. I think there's too much pressure at the coffee shop or having dinner or something. It's funny. We should just get a coffee to go and then plan on sitting in the car the whole time. That would work.

I also saw dear old Karla. She looked really good. Had fun chatting with her also. It's weird, I've been saying "chatting" or "chatted" or "chat" a lot lately. I think I think I'm from England or something.

Oh, I went to mom's class this morning. My little students you know. They brought me valentines and candy and a mom even brought me a gift! Can you believe it? I couldn't. But Happy Valentine's to me!

Heard from dad and Chris in Kenya. They're having a great time!

Oh, I'm sick. I know I can't believe it. I never get sick. But I guess being in the school and taking care of my sick mother I caught it. Sad. I'm going to work out this afternoon and try and sweat it out. We'll see how that goes. Water and exercising are my dad's remedy for EVERYTHING!

Wednesday, February 09, 2005

Halfway there

I have a good friend who read this book that I'm reading, "The Dream Giver". Well...that book is what inspired this person to leave their job that they had to pursue other "things". To pursue their dreams. They left what was familiar and nice and easy and at hand for "the dream". Well that's only half of it. Granted that's more than most people do, but still...only half. The other half is actually following after that dream and doing it.

Now let me give this person credit. They did leave what was familiar to follow their dream. The problem is that they don't know what the dream is. I would say this is a huge problem, but a familiar one. I myself don't know that I know what my dreams are exactly. I'm sure there are at least one or maybe two that I have suppressed way down and are not ready to emerge quite yet. But for right now I am living one of my dreams so I am not eager to find the rest. That is not the case for my friend. This person does not know what their dream is and is therefore, waiting. What a pain! And in this case, after much thought, I believe this person should just try things. It has been my experience that for me personally, sometimes I just have to make a decision and THEN God tells me whether I should do it or not. Sometimes I have to change my decision that was made. But that's life and it's how you learn to hear God's voice better.

Don't sit by and let life pass you by. Do not! Do what you've always dreamed of doing, go where you've always wanted to go, be what you've always wanted to be. You CAN do it. Whatever those dreams may be, God has instilled you with the abilities, talents, and power to do them and make them happen. Enough with your excuses about money or time or family or school or any crazy thing like that. This is between you and God. Do not forget the reason you were put on this earth. To glorify God!

Monday, February 07, 2005

Hypocondriacs

Today I was Miss Kimbrell, the substitute for Mrs. Kimbrell. Mom was sick so I took over 4th grade for her! What a fun day I had. I already know these kids, but they know me as Miss Kathryn. (Me and my dad come in there about once a week and get them all riled up for mom and are funny with them.) So today I'm Miss Kimbrell! They were hilarious. But mom's class is full of at least a dozen kids that think they are always dying. There were two with knee problems today, two with "terrible" stomach aches in which I told them not to run or talk too loud and that would help, a few with chlorine in their eyes (from swimming) in which I told them the only thing I could do for them was stick their head in the water fountain and squirt water in their eyes! They were so funny! The greatest is this kid named Caleb who is one of those guys that is so funny but has no idea he's funny. You know what I mean? Some other kid in the class told me that Caleb could sing "Amazing Grace" and would do it for me. I asked Caleb if he would sing it for me, but he got so embarassed and said he couldn't do it cause he didn't know all the words even though I kept asking. Then, all of sudden while I'm talking to another little girl in the class, he comes up and just starts "singing" the song to me very monotoned like with no expression. It was everything I could do to not laugh at him. But it was sweet. I could and would take him home with me. I had a blast today with them even though I had no idea what I was doing. That's the beauty of it I guess, they have no idea I don't have a clue, right?

Oh, my and Chris are safely in Kitale, Kenya working with the people there. And God worked in His sovereign way and got all the medical supplies and medicine out of this country and safely into theirs! Praise God!

Thursday, February 03, 2005

Today

So much is going on in my life that many people have no idea about. And I really don't want to tell people. I don't want people to know that I am weak. They already know that, but I don't want to be the one to tell them. You know? It's totally different.

Struggles is mostly what I'm talking about. I want to be the strong one and so many times I feel like that's my role. I'm to be the one with all the faith in God, to always trust and know that EVERYTHING will work out for the good of those who love God. To believe and never doubt. To always be chipper. To have everything in it's place. To know my path in life and know what's coming next and what I am to be doing. To know the right answer. To never cry and to never be hurt by someone. To just let things role off my back.

Well...I can't. There, I said it. I can't. And I'm not. I am just like everyone else.

Now, don't worry, I'm not depressed or anything and there's nothing permanently damaging happening to me, although I know that everything is life-changing in some way or another.

I do know God's promises and I believe them to be completely true. Really. I just struggle with always knowing it in my heart like I do in my head. I'm sure everyone can relate.

Today I feel...well...lost. Lost in this big world that completely encompasses me and I feel so small and covered by it. Today I am struggling with purpose and meaning in my life. I am weak in my faith today, questioning God's provision and timing. Today I am hurt by something I can do nothing about, having to trust God to know what's best, but struggling with that trust. Today I am missing so many people that I can't even begin to go into it. Today I am confused and unsure of decisions I have made. Today I am feeling like my efforts are in vain. I am not strong today. Today I am weak.

Although today has been so many things, God still whispers, "Believe my now. I am with you. I am for you. Believe me now." It rings and rings. And I know it's true. I know He's there.

Just figuring this is another step to drawing me closer to Himself that I ask for each morning.

Does anyone else struggle with not being able to communicate how you feel about God? I am horrible with words and everything I feel and want to express about God comes forth and wants to come out of my huge mouth and come to the edge and stop because I just don't have the words. I want so badly to just show the world how much I am in love with this amazing God that is grace, is love, is mercy, is faithful, is everything good. My mind is a whirlwind just trying to think of it all. Trying to understand and fully comprehend what I feel is impossible. WOW!


Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Searching

Do you know what I've been researching online for about 20 minutes now? An opportunity to go overseas. I've been on the International Mission Board website. Getting on that website and looking at all the possibilities of where I could go and then reading the job descriptions and what's needed just get's my heart pounding and my blood stirring.

I've been reading a great book that Beth Marshal gave me before I left, "The Dream Giver" by Bruce Wilkinson. I know, the Prayer of Jabez guy. I was skeptical too, but it's good, I promise. Anyway, the first half of the book gives an illustration about a guy named Normal who lives in the land of Ordinary or the other way around. Whatever. The point is that it talks about God has put a dream in each one of us. Everyone has one, but some of us suppress it or ignore it. The point of all of this that I'm trying to figure out what mine is.

1st graders!

Well...yesterday I was the teacher for the day in one of the 1st grade classes at BCA. Very interesting with very fun moments. They were a funny bunch of children. At one point at I had to take a boy's shoe. It kept coming off because he wouldn't keep it tied and I warned him to make sure it stayed on his foot or I would take it. So I did. I kept it for the rest of the day and walked around with one shoe on. I laughed inside and the other students laughed also. They couldn't believe I took his shoe from him. My mom asked me if I wanted to be a teacher one day. No, I don't. Not in a school in this setting at least. My favorite parts of the day were when I read them stories and we talked about God. I would love to teach Sunday school to children one day. Their ideas and thoughts about God are so pure and honest. They don't try to impress, just speak their hearts. But if I did teach to really teach I would like to do it overseas. I would love to go back to Cambodia and teach. It's teaching with a purpose of building relationships and teaching what they really need: the love and saving grace of Christ. We'll see what God has in mind.

Overall, a very good day, but tiring. I was exhausted.

Today...I'm a drug pusher. I have probably 15 boxes of antibiotics and pain killers in my dining room. If someone walked in they would think something was terribly wrong. I am dividing them up and putting them into bags equally. It's a task that may take a while. But it must be done. Someone must do it. FYI, the group going to Kenya is taking all of this over for the medical clinic they're doing come next week.

I have three new financial supporters! Thank you for your prayers. Keep praying, God is answering.