No Angst
I noticed something about myself this morning and last night. Here I am leaving this life that I've worked so hard to build for myself. I've worked at building lasting relationships with people here in Colorado and here I am leaving it not even two years later. I started working with the high school girls in January of this year only to leave it in October. I have been working at this job for about a year and half working my way through the organization trying to show people that I can do this job and I can do it well. I have finally gotten to the place with people that they not only respect me but they love me, truly care for me and believe in me. And now I'm leaving it.
But there is a peace that is all around me and all over me and around me.
I am at a job where I've been given a lot of responsibilities that most 24 year olds would only dream about this early in their career. I'm thankful and honored. And right now I am training others to do what I've worked so hard to do. I'm passing on the baton. I'm training others to do my job.
I have been recruiting girlfriends of mine in the church to start working with the high school girls because they need someone after I leave. Last night we had a fellowship night with about 90 students there (that's huge since there was only about 15 coming in March!). These girls showed up last night ready to meet the girls and hang out with them. The youth were excited. I was introducing and trying to make people feel comfortable with each other. I stood there looking around realizing that I am passing on the baton there as well. I will always love those youth girls and they will keep a special place in my heart, but the time will come when they will be going to these new helpers for advice and laughter instead of me.
The thing about both of these situations is that I am not jealous of the others coming in to take my place. I don't really feel like it's my place to take. That peace that I was talking about is telling me over and over again that my time here is up. I don't feel angst about it. I am happy to see others carrying it on. I don't always understand it, but God is moving me forwards to do something else. I know pieces of what that is.
It's just wonderful to see how God has grown in me and brought me to this point. It wonderful to see how, although I am leaving and was worried about who will do what I've been doing, there was no need, God is providing and more abundantly than any of us had thought or imagined. Funny huh...how He always does that!
But there is a peace that is all around me and all over me and around me.
I am at a job where I've been given a lot of responsibilities that most 24 year olds would only dream about this early in their career. I'm thankful and honored. And right now I am training others to do what I've worked so hard to do. I'm passing on the baton. I'm training others to do my job.
I have been recruiting girlfriends of mine in the church to start working with the high school girls because they need someone after I leave. Last night we had a fellowship night with about 90 students there (that's huge since there was only about 15 coming in March!). These girls showed up last night ready to meet the girls and hang out with them. The youth were excited. I was introducing and trying to make people feel comfortable with each other. I stood there looking around realizing that I am passing on the baton there as well. I will always love those youth girls and they will keep a special place in my heart, but the time will come when they will be going to these new helpers for advice and laughter instead of me.
The thing about both of these situations is that I am not jealous of the others coming in to take my place. I don't really feel like it's my place to take. That peace that I was talking about is telling me over and over again that my time here is up. I don't feel angst about it. I am happy to see others carrying it on. I don't always understand it, but God is moving me forwards to do something else. I know pieces of what that is.
It's just wonderful to see how God has grown in me and brought me to this point. It wonderful to see how, although I am leaving and was worried about who will do what I've been doing, there was no need, God is providing and more abundantly than any of us had thought or imagined. Funny huh...how He always does that!
2 Comments:
No will ever be able to truly fill your shoes. We're all gonna miss you. What can we be praying for? Is there anything that you need?
K-
I'm SO THRILLED to hear that you have such peace during this transition of leaving CO behind and embracing the new adventure in front of you. It's going to be FABULOUS! How well I remember that feeling of peace in what was ahead even when it wasn't concrete yet.
What a blessed place to be!
Natalie
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home